James 4:1-10
My wandering heart
We’re looking at James 4.1-10, but just before we dive in there, let’s recap on the setting. But rather than starting at James 1 – let’s step right back to get a panoramic look at James, within the context of the whole of the Bible, for just a moment.
In Genesis – right at the very start – there’s a tranquil, exciting anticipation (1.2) when the Spirit of God is hovering over the surface of the waters – and the world is formless! Then God creates man – and he breathes life into his nostrils (Gen 2.7). But Adam, in his arrogance, wants to be like God.
Because of the serpent’s lies, he mistrusts God and rejects his life-giving Spirit – and instead he receives a different spirit, one that’s still at work today…
The whole of the rest of the Bible tells the history past and yet to come of the restoration of God’s union with us – the most astonishing marriage – and the lengths God will go to rescue us, his beloved bride, time and time again – in order to eventually get us to the most splendid wedding any of us will ever go to, much less be part of!
Paul beautifully crafts Ephesians – linking the old to the new – with almost cinematic wonder! It’s like the lights on stage left and right have been dimmed, the atmospheric music captivates us, and there, centre stage, under a naked light, is the Spirit – who puts Jesus into our hearts – the Spirit of Christ – to live in us.
That is remarkable!
And surely with the Spirit now inside us, our lives will entirely reflect Jesus! Our affections and desires will always be righteous! Our actions will testify to total body transformation!
But then Jeremiah warns (17.9) – remember the heart is wicked and evil above all else – and Paul says – yes, just look at me! I don’t do the good I want to, but I do the things I DON’T!
But hope is not lost! Because if we truly have the Spirit of Christ in is, when we know God as Christ in us, we don’t have to fear or cover our twisted affections. And in fact, James is encouraging us to explore them!
Now, in our modern reformed Christian circles we tend to avoid talk of emotion – but obviously emotions and desires are intertwined and James mentions quite a lot of them in this short book – joy, anger, jealousy, pleasure, sorrow, grief – and more!
And, isn’t it interesting that the book of James is often referred to as the ‘Proverbs of the NT’. Proverbs is the book of wisdom – and James says to us here, ‘dive into true faith – because when you have that, you’ll be mature – you’ll know how to deal with all these emotions and desires, and you can ask God for wisdom and he will give it to you generously!’
So, we’ve been on this journey to draw out that wisdom – and to do that, I wanted to start tonight by looking at Proverbs 20.5 (VOICE translation):
“The real motives come from deep within a person, as from deep waters, but a discerning person is able to draw them up and expose them.”
So, tonight, let’s ask the Lord for his wisdom – for the insight that the Spirit gives us as he searches out the depths of our hearts (1 Cor 2.10) – and, as we come face to face with our emotions and desires. Pray with me: Lord help us with this passage, so we won’t be tempted to either suppress or ignore what’s going on inside us, nor be controlled by these things. As we partner with your Spirit in this, as we plumb the depths of our hearts, we’ll apply your word – Jesus – help us to really see what’s going on. And where we discover fear, faith that’s not yet mature — and self-protection, help us Lord to come to you – to run into your safe arms – Amen.
James 4 v.1 What’s causing the quarrels and fights among you?
You experience it all the time – conflict. And you probably don’t have to think back too many days – maybe it was even just at dinner time tonight – to recall an incident.
Maybe it was a falling out with a family member, a colleague, someone here at church, your spouse, your kids, a neighbour…
As I prepared for tonight, I thought about what it’d be like to stand up here and say, “My life is incredibly peace-filled; I rarely experience conflict or confrontation…” but the longer I looked at myself, the more shocked I was at the chaos. And the more inadequate I felt about teaching James 4!
In my work I do a lot of coaching and training – and I love starting with a surprise: a question or statement that derails people’s thinking and catches them totally off guard. I don’t know about you, but my head is full of so much noise! The surprise question quiets even all that noise, and suddenly my gaze is redirected. And that’s what I really like about how this chapter starts – James asks, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you?”
Now, since Chap 1, James has been saying – by faith, you are already saved from an eternity without the Lord. And now until you enter eternity, by works, your soul will be overjoyed that your life was not wasted.
We were justified before God by faith and heaven is his gift. His Spirit has made you alive with the life of his most beautiful Son. He regenerated you. He gave you a new heart, a new and potentially consuming desire to love him and others at any cost to yourself. Justification makes us his children.
Regeneration provides the muscle to live like his child. And because justification is always accompanied by regeneration, our way of relating to each other will prove the presence of divine life in us!
Or will it?!
No longer is your life meant to be shaped by your wants, your needs, your feelings. You have been called to a life that is shaped by God’s kingdom. James 4 is the climax of that conversation!
Conflict is a revealing place to start this discussion. It’s like having one of those mirrors with lights that surround the edge – where you can see every blemish and fine line – and conflict exposes how deep that struggle is within us. This passage is hard to hear because its teaching is so clear. I don’t want to think it characterises my struggle, but it most absolutely does.
“What causes quarrels and fights among you?” Oh, you know what? It’s ok – you’re tired, exhausted, you’ve given quite enough of yourself lately. Maybe you’re on your period or trying to survive menopause! Or you’re hungry, hot, cold or feeling poorly…
When we’re in conflict with one another, our instinct is to defend the conflict. ‘If I just wasn’t so rundown… If I could just have a day off work… If my family didn’t need me so much… If I just had a little more money… If this person could disappear—‘…
And sometimes, when we share the load with a well-meaning friend, they’ll try to comfort us by saying something like: ‘Love, you need to take care of you. You need to put yourself first. Your well-being comes first sister…’
But James does something radically different – he draws us in to see something that’s incredibly important for us to face: “What causes quarrels and fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?”
Even as I was preparing for tonight – Jonathan was wearing down my every last nerve: he was trying to get ready for work and I’d set myself up in the middle of the lounge to work on prepping this message. But as he went back and forth from upstairs to down, then room to room, floors creaking, stopping to talk to the dog, then ask me ridiculous questions like, ‘can I get you a cup of tea? Do you want a blanket?’… I mean — can’t he see that I’m busy! I’m trying to write! And study my Bible! He’s so inconsiderate!
And at the very same time as I’m processing how annoyed I am because my desires for peace are being ignored — James says, ‘Here’s what’s going on in you: there’s a war being fought!’
Think about it – Is your marriage free of impatience, irritation? Are all your friendships peace-filled? As a parent, is there harmonic bliss between you and your children – 100% of the time? What about here – is there serenity between us women? What home, church or community is free of conflict?!
And, what’s more shocking – the conflict isn’t rooted in our circumstances (how tired or stressed we are) it’s rooted in our hearts.
It is a war of passion, or desires. You search for things that please you, things that bring you pleasure, that fulfil your wants and desires. But if you are the Lord’s, there are conflicting desires within you.
There are the desires that are fanned into flame by the spirit of this world – by the word of the devil: “God’s not good, he can’t be trusted, you won’t die if you disobey him, look at me – I’m still alive! He just doesn’t want you to have your eyes opened to true wisdom, because you’ll become a god like him.”
That’s where we started tonight – in Genesis 3.1-7, and then James 3.15 & Ephesians 2.2-3.
But there are also the desires that are fanned into flame by the Spirit – the Spirit who’s given us a new desire of delight in the holiness of God’s royal law – ‘to love your neighbour as yourself’ (Jam 2:8) and a craving to display fruits of love, joy, peace, self-control… (Jam 3.17) Not a dutiful, guilty obligation!
The old nature of the flesh and the new nature of the Spirit are in a hot war – and so we oscillate; we swing between our old self-concerned past, and our new self-forgetfulness, living in worship and serving Jesus.
So, where are you at tonight?
v.2 You want what you don’t have, so you scheme and kill to get it. You are jealous of what others have, but you can’t get it, so you fight and wage war to take it away from them.
When my heart is being ruled by a craving for something in creation, the way I see you is distorted. I won’t be able to see you as a sister I love. I’ll only see you as a way of getting what I want or an obstacle to it.
And even a desire for a good thing, becomes a bad thing, when that desire becomes a ruling thing. And when people fail to deliver on our desires, when they’re obstacles, you’re spontaneously angry, shockingly short tempered, and you want to remove them – put them in a box. They consume your thoughts, your actions – and your prayers. They consume your relationship with God; look at v3:
v.3 And even when you ask, you don’t get, because your motives are all wrong—you want only what will give you pleasure
What would happen in your home growing up if you begged and begged your dad for something – relentlessly? What if every conversation, every interaction you had was follow up with ‘oh, dad – don’t forget, I still want a pony.’
‘How was school today sweetheart? — ‘Good! Oh dad, I really want a pony…’
‘Honey – can you take out the bin?’ — ‘Ya. And dad, I really want a pony…’
‘Good night baby girl – sleep well.’ — ‘Night-night dad. Dad, I still really want a pony…’
I can tell you exactly how that’d go down in my house – it would not end well! When every conversation, all our interactions are consumed with our chasing; we don’t really want God to be our Father. We want him to be our genie in a bottle – ready to grant whatever wish we ask for!
David Henderson, who wrote Culture Shift, said: “We’ve tended to turn the Christian faith into a relationship through Christ, with a God who is the divine vending machine in the sky, there to meet our every need. Unhappy? Unattractive? Unsuccessful? Unmarried?… Come to Christ – He will give you everything you ask for. We forget…God is not primarily in the business of meeting needs. And when we make Him out to be, we squeeze Him out of His rightful place at the centre of our lives, and we put ourselves in His place.”
It’s humbling and shocking to think about how many godless prayers we regularly pray. Prayers that don’t have anything to do with God’s plans. Prayers that don’t have anything to do with the Kingdom of God.
Instead, we pray – hoping that God will satisfy the longings of our hearts – and just gift us all the things we’ve decided are good for us!! But suddenly your relationship with the Lord is just about him meeting your list of demands!
Which makes me think, tonight, what is it you really want from God? What do you crave from Him? And what about the people He’s put all around you – at work, church, home?
And here’s the bigger picture:
v.4 You adulterers! Don’t you realise that friendship with the world makes you an enemy of God? I say it again: If you want to be a friend of the world, you make yourself an enemy of God
Our primary problem isn’t that we don’t love one another enough.
Our primary problem is that we don’t love God enough.
Our broken relationships – the ones in conflict – is where it’s easiest to shine a light on the spiritual adultery in our hearts.
Adultery is when I give what I’ve promised to one – to someone else. And like I mentioned at the start, we’re Christ’s bride – he’s brought us into relationship with him! And in that marriage picture – He owns our love. He owns the deepest parts of our hearts – and we struggle with one another, because there are SO MANY OTHER lovers that want our affections!
But rather than condemning us and demanding an explanation – it’s like James gently leans in and, with soft eyes and a gentle tone – he says ‘look – see how beautiful, faithful, splendid and eternal God’s love is for you! Don’t you know who you are? Not because of anything you’ve done, or haven’t done — but by God’s grace — you are his eternal and true love.’ And TRUE love is always jealous – in all the right ways!
v.5 Do you think the Scriptures have no meaning? They say that God is passionate that the spirit he has placed within us should be faithful to him
In a world where love is cheap – it’s hard to even find words to express the gravity of the way the Lord loves you! His love for you is so pure and faithful, so there’s no way that He can tolerate a dirty, unfaithful, selfish heart that wanders and keeps chasing after other lovers.
Paul Tripp gave an excellent example of this that I’ve adapted: It’d be like if Jonathan and I were home one night and we cuddled up on the sofa, and he wraps his arm around me and then looks into my eyes and says “Hollie, I love you most —- out of all the women I love.”
Well first, I’d be heartbroken. But second, I can tell you for certain that his nose would be a different shape – and I’m sure that wouldn’t be wrong because I love him! It’s right for me to crave his love and to want it to be exclusive!
And then, the verse that helps me see and hear God’s heartbeat:
v. 6 “But he gives more grace.” – “And he gives grace generously”
If grace was just an empowering force, this would be like popping to the petrol station and filling up every time the needle of our grace-o-meter starts to go into the red.
But what if grace is the presence of the Holy Spirit. What if more grace is a deeper relationship with the Father, as the Spirit keeps showing us more and more of how amazing he is!
We’re not alone in this war. We’re not fighting by ourselves. Christ faced all the same battles that we face of being seduced by the world. He was tempted by all the same things that tempt us – so he knows how hard the struggle is. And so does our Helper – the Spirit who was right there with him!
The Spirit – who was there before creation, hovering over the waters, who watched as Adam traded him, the life-giving Spirit for the counterfeit spirit of the world – he is with us in this war right now – battling on your behalf. And he is greater than the most thrashing war in any heart anyone here is facing tonight.
His grace is greater and greater! We get him more and more! In relational terms, instead of thinking of grace as petrol in a tank that keeps running out – think of relating to grace like this: girl meets boy – more specifically, Hollie meets Jonathan – and we get to know each other a bit. And that bit grows into something bigger. And then bigger grows into a full relationship and I have more and more and more of him, as he gives himself to me generously.
But, the difference is that – if I put my faith in my romance with Jonathan, I’m building my house on sand. Because he’s a wonderful husband but – the more I get of him, the more I realise what a wretched man he is! That is the folly in not putting my faith in the only one who can fulfill.
Instead – I put my faith in Christ, whose love is unconditional. Whose passion for me is persistent. Who knows my wandering heart – and he gives me more and more and more of him – and more and more my heart is captivated! The more confident I am to come out from my hiding and say:
“Yes – Lord – James 4 is me! Sometimes my greatest joy is knowing you and I could not be more satisfied! And in those moments, when I know how greatly I’m loved by you, I’m kinder, more patient, generous with my time, my needs, my love… But Lord, so often, I’m the wretch. I’m turned in on myself and all I can think about is ME! In those moments my fuse is short, my anger is great, my impatience is revolting. I say and do things that don’t have anything to do with your kingdom YET, comforted by your Grace, your Spirit who’s at work in me, I RUN TO YOU.”
v.7-8 So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.
In the first instance, I give myself in surrender. Then I ask for the Spirit’s wisdom. The enemy is just that – he wants nothing short of total destruction. He will use every trick, every deception – we must be watchful! And not just for ourselves, but for our friends, for our spouses, for our children…
And finally, it’s time to break out the soap – don’t just ignore the dirt and grime. Bring it out into the Light of Love so that the passions that have been hidden, the design for my kingdom, is exposed.
This will be painful, there’s even a clear call to weep!
v.9 Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy
When was the last time you wept over your sin – over all the things you chase and love more than you chase after and love the Lord? When was the last time your hording after other pleasures caused you to cringe? Or can you look in the mirror and be unmoved? (If that’s the case – we’re in trouble.)
We ought to be the saddest and the gladdest community on earth — sad, because the brokenness of our dark hearts. And glad because we get Jesus! We get his glory, his love and his friendship.
Tonight where are you at?
v.10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honour
Are you needy? Are you poor? Are you broken? God welcomes you – you who are honest and humble. And he makes a trustworthy promise in John 6.37 – ‘Whoever comes to me, I will never, ever turn away.’
The problem of our everyday brokenness isn’t the mess of the world and the people around us, the problem is the wandering and unfaithfulness of our own hearts!
In Adam, our ‘eyes were opened’ to receive the wisdom of this world (and as James 3:15 & Genesis 3:5 says, it’s unspiritual and demonic). But now, as believers who have the Spirit of God, we can ask him every day to give us his eyes to see true wisdom – and to reassure us that our hearts will continue to be reshaped to be more like his, and have his desires – (Ephesians 1:17-18).
We can’t do it in our strength – it’s impossible to resist all the screaming demands of your flesh! But we can ask him for more of the Spirit – and the Spirit will show us how to freely indulge the desires of our new hearts!
Don’t leave it — come to the father: because your friends, your marriage, your children, your church family, and we here, need you to come.
GRACE PLACE 